June 7, 2010 § 5 Comments
I’m staying up to send another man a love text.
He’s facing some mad problems trying to clean up a messy work situation and I don’t want to disturb him with my randomness, so I’m waiting till he’s done, which should be in another 20 minutes.
‘I love you to bits,’ it will read.
Except, it’s not from me. I’m doing the Sister a favour. She’s currently in Berlin and as her husband is out with no internet connection, I have become their official middleman.
‘Can you do me a favour?’ The Sister asked me earlier on. ‘Can you tell Joe that I’m logged in to chat now? I’m hoping he can log in too.’
‘Sure,’ I said, returning with the news Joe was at Brewerkz trying to settle some work and hadn’t gone home yet. It was already close to 11pm. ‘He wanted to know how you were doing,’ I said.
‘I’m okay. Set up has hit a few hiccups but we’re not freaking out yet. I’m homesick and miss him loads and loads. Berlin is boring with a capital B without him. OH! And there’s no freaking hot water pot in this freaking hotel… and it has no aircon?! or heater?! Just a window that opens!!!’ She replied. I dutifully conveyed the message.
‘I have a confession,’ Joe replied. ‘I thought of telling her about my day physically. Then I realized she’s away. And tears welled up. Tell her I miss her. And let her know I’m brainstorming over beers cos everything with the presentation bombed today. Meeting is tomorrow at 11.’
Shucks. I felt strangely voyeuristic at this point.
‘I miss you too sweetie. I wish there was a better way we could be there for each other, but I’ve got you on my mind all the time! *big hugs* Sorry to hear everything bombed. I don’t understand why but hang in there baby, I’m wishing you all the best.’ The Sister typed her reply.
I smiled at the screen. The entire situation was weird but I felt the love and it was just a gorgeous emotion.
‘You guys are darling…’ I told the Sister.
‘But mushy,’ she answered.
I couldn’t stop smiling to myself, stuck between their oozing love for each other.
‘Hello?’ I picked up the ringing phone.
‘Hey, it’s me,’ Joe said. ‘I just finished so… are you still chatting with her?’
‘Yeah,’ I said.
‘Well, could you let her know I’ll be home in 20 minutes so if she’s still around, I’ll try to catch her for a bit,’ he continued.
‘Sure thing,’ I laughed into the phone. ‘Oh! And she wanted to say… she loves you to bits.’
‘This is too damn weird,’ Joe answered.
I agree. But it was way better than watching Glee on my laptop.
‘Truthfully, this is the fabric of all my fantasies: love shown not by a kiss or a wild look or a careful hand but by a willingness for research. I don’t dream of someone who understands me immediately, who seems to have known me my entire life, who says, I know me too.
I want someone keen to learn my own strange organization, amazed at what’s revealed; someone who asks, and then what, and then what?’
– Elizabeth McCracken
Like telling someone you love them on the first date, I wondered if I’d declared my passions a little to early, and in doing so… killed all potential of a future together.
After my first run on the tracks again a few days ago, I signed up for a half-marathon in December. I scanned the FAQs and realised with horror that I had no idea what was involved in this new relationship.
‘What have I done?’ I gasped as I stared at the confirmation slip. Humidity levels, heat exhaustion, shoes, clothing, running clinics… it all swarmed around in my head. But the more I thought about it, the more I was certain of my decision. I want to do this. Not for anyone else… but myself.
Since then, I’ve been reading up on marathons and running… and like meeting a new love, it’s all terribly fascinating and at the same time, I feel a little scared.
‘Do you want to run together?’ a friend asked me.
‘Really? I only just started and am really slow…’ I replied.
‘It’s okay, me too.’ He said, sending me the map of our trail.
And all of a sudden, I didn’t feel alone anymore.
‘A new city seems so much more friendly and warm when you have someone to just hang out with…’ read a text I received today.
And I can’t agree more.
So my dear darling new found love… I think I’m ready for this relationship, and to find out more about myself in the process.
See you soon on the tracks.