a rude awakening

3.30am

It wasn’t a bad dream. But it was… bothersome. The details were so clear, vivid and it felt so real. The words of plea, the loss, the heart’s cry still rang in my head over and over again, the emotions still raw and tangible. I turned over and did my best to push it out of my head, to think of other things but sleep was fast escaping through the cracks of slumber. I was wide awake. I lay there, breathing deeply… thinking.

4.00am

Hot cocoa. A warm drink is always soothing and helps put a person to bed, no? It’s worth a try. I climb out of bed, ignoring the cries of sanity, ‘You have a long day ahead! You have a meeting at 9.30am! You have a big night!

I figured that if I couldn’t sleep, at least I could spend the waking hours doing things I like. I munch on some grapes I find in the chiller, while I wait for the water to boil. And I keep turning the dream over and over again in my head… like a damn song on repeat.

4.15am

Randomly surf the internet in search for interesting news, music reviews, updates on my friends’ blogs, anything… and then I decided to listen to some music. ‘I need the Dream Maker’, I think to myself.

4.20am

The Mother walks in. She was on her way to the loo.

‘You forgot to sleep?’ She asks groggily.

‘No… I had a bothersome dream. Not a nightmare, not a bad dream, but one that really bothers me.’ I replied.

‘Mmmfftt…’ came her reply.

4.30am

I begin praying while listening to music. I sing along. I keep myself warm in His love. The dream has begun to recede into the dark corridors of my mind. They lose colour and start to pale. The story is slowly losing its hold.

4.45am

I shall write. It always helps. Even if it’s about nothing, so I begin the post. Interesting… I think to myself. I actually have the perfect picture saved on my desktop.

I want to sleep. It’s already 5.02am. I had originally planned on falling asleep by 5am but even the best laid plans go awry.

5.09am

A headache is starting to develop. The body wants sleep. It knows it needs its rest. ‘It’s time to try again…’ I think as I end this post and prepare to shut down the computer. I contemplate going in to work late tomorrow but know it’s not a possibility. The meeting is urgent. When are meetings not?

With a sigh and a final prayer…

Goodnight.

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