at the end
December 1, 2009 § Leave a comment
At the end of my life, I want to know that I have thoroughly enjoyed my journey on earth. I want to have loved, to have sacrificed out of desire and understanding, to have tasted emotions and in them, tasted the richness of Christ’s goodness in my life. I want to know that I’d impacted lives, not necessarily on a large stadium scale but individual lives that somehow, after meeting me, could find the inspiration and passion to carry on, to make a change.
At the end of my life, I want to be surrounded by love. I want to still get excited watching an ant push a crumb across the massive planes of my table, to smile when I see a flower bloom in the rain, to laugh when I hear a belly chuckle. I want to be able to enjoy snuggling under the comforters when it’s cold, to cuddle a warm body and squeal when the warm body’s toes are freezing cold.
Most of all, I want to laugh till I cry.
I want to be found smiling when I am gone.
There are so many years left that I know, the journey in truth, has only just begun. I can only thank God that at this junction, I know what love and desire is. I can enjoy the simple pleasures and be mesmerized by the complex. I get an adrenaline rush with chaos and gain sweet satisfaction from a mere piece of paperwork.
And on my tombstone?
‘She lived, laughed and loved passionately. With amazing style.’
I wonder what I’d wear in heaven?
[Image by Paul Boomsma]